Comfort and joy – words we often associate with Christmas, bringing a feeling of warmth and kindness that connects us to others. Sadly, it's easy to limit this mindset to once a year and sometimes it seems easier to give this kindness to strangers than to our own family members.
Comfort through consideration.
As a therapist, I’ve seen that many of the issues couples and families face could be solved if they applied the same kind of respect and understanding they give to coworkers, friends, and even strangers. In most workplaces, there are unspoken rules about how to behave—like keeping your emotions in check, showing respect, and practicing common courtesy. But sometimes, couples and families forget to follow these basic principles with each other.
We usually try to be patient, understanding, respectful, kind, and thoughtful with friends and even strangers throughout the day. So why, when we get home, do we sometimes let ourselves be impatient, rude, angry, selfish, or thoughtless? Why do we often give our best to people we may never see again, but treat the people we love the most with less kindness?
What if we made a conscious choice to show up as our best selves every day, no matter what we’re going through? It’s easy to let our guard down at home, thinking we can relax and just be ourselves, but what if “being ourselves” also meant being patient, kind, and understanding, even when we’re tired or stressed?
Imagine how much more positive our relationships could be if we consistently put in the effort to spread comfort and joy, not just to strangers, but to the people closest to us. It could shift the whole dynamic, creating an environment where we feel supported, loved, and connected—where we bring out the best in each other, even when life gets challenging. By choosing to lead with kindness, even when we’re exhausted, we could create lasting change in how we experience our relationships and the quality of time we spend together.
Your Relationship Prescription
Bringing comfort and joy into your relationship doesn’t have to mean big gestures—it’s the little, everyday things that count. A kind word, a simple hug, or just being there for each other can make a huge difference. When you focus on staying emotionally connected and supporting each other through both the good and the tough times, you create a relationship full of warmth, safety, and love.
So today, take a moment to check in with each other, show appreciation, or just enjoy a quiet moment together. Those small acts of comfort are what lay the groundwork for lasting joy.